Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Critique of Black People Meet


After spending day after day checking my BLACK PEOPLE MEET site for mail I've come to a few conclusions about the site. I keep thinking maybe tomorrow the responses I get on BPM will turn around (Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result -- Einstein). The subscription initially costs $39 plus $8.95 per month. That's about $140/year x 40 profilers = $5,600 a year (not 67.000 as I had typed earlier-lol). They have way more than 40 subscribers. What a business! I should go into this one.

I was inspired by the disappointing results and this fact about the income they generate to create a list that spells out how blackpeoplemeet.com REALLY works for most consumers o the product. I posted this list as my greeting on my profile as well. LOL!
  1. NO FLIRTS PLEASE: Men and women visit profiles that say "no flirts" (short hand notes with icons that say "I like your profile" or "I'm interested" or "You're cute") and still ignore the profiler's request and wonder why they get no response and no dates.
  2. WHO'S VIEWED ME? A Who's Viewed Me? link lets you see the pics and profiles of others who visit your profile. From that you can tell who replies and who doesn't but knowing all that doesn't make a difference in your rate of return even if you reach out after they visit and don't reply. So what's the point? To keep us busy.
  3. HAVEN'T I SEEN YOU BEFORE: If you stay on the site and pay your membership for more than a year you'll see the same faces looking over time but still get no real response.
  4. EARNING FROM LONGING (or misery loves company): Black People Meet (as well as Black Yahoo Personals and BlackSingles.com or other subscription dating services) depends on making money from our lack of commitment and we keep coming back because the state of our longing continues. This is why most consumers of these dating service don't demand the demonstrate and display their success rates before registeration.
  5. COMMITMENT: It is said you can tell what you are committed to by looking at where you spend your time and money and the results you have as a function of those actions. Perhaps the site should be called Black People Don't Meet.
  6. SOUNDTRACK: It should be the Isley Brothers "Who's that Lady? esp. when they sing the part that says "Look, but don't touch, baby, nah, nah, nah, don't touch!"
  7. FEAR: Black people are afraid in person and online so the tip of the iceberg (lack of connections on blackpeoplemeet.com) reflects the mountain of fear and unfillment that many black singles experience in everyday life.
I wonder if Black Yahoo Personals and BlackSingles.com works this way too? Anyone know?

I assert this experience might be a measure of the state of black relationships or better yet the state of our commitment to being related. I'd love to hear about your online experiences. I'd rather hear about those who have actual experience (on the court) rather than critiques about those who use these sites but have not (peanut gallery; from the stands).

2 comments:

mocha said...

i've been a paid member of this site for about a month. i still can't figure out how anyone actually meets. originally i stated in my profile "no flirts". when that was ignored, i sent flirts back to the people who were sending me flirts. then i got no response. it was as if they didn't remember who they were flirting with.

so i'm just waiting for my subsciption to run out. so far the only interesting conversation i've had was with a guy over 2,000 miles away.

Kyra D. Gaunt, Ph.D. said...

Yeah, I know what you mean. So what's next for you? IF you live in NYC you should come to our next event.